Fasting

While I was eating dinner tonight (red meat!) I was going through a pile of crap on my table. In this pile was a calendar that my mom gave me a couple weeks ago. It was in a bag, so I didn't know exactly what it looked like, but I knew what it was. A 2007 Greek Orthodox Church Ecclesiastical calendar. Gads. Nobody puts the 'fun' in fundamental like the Greeks. I mean that in the nicest way possible. I mock, but only because I am one of them.

As I'm eating my red meat dinner, I'm reminded that Eastern Orthodox Christians take their Lent pretty seriously. Whoops. Today is actually a strict fast day. No oil, wine, dairy, fish or meat. Except for the wine, I've eaten every single one of those things today. Oh well, It's pretty obvious that I've never done very well with the whole fasting thing. One year my fasting consisted of giving up Doritos. On the way to church for midnight Easter services I stopped and bought a bag. After church, at 2 o'clock in the morning, I ate the whole bag. I'm not fasting or giving up any foods this year. First of all, I haven't been to church in months and second of all, I don't need to mess with my food. If I start denying myself certain foods, I'm destined to binge.

If everybody is fasting for 6 or so weeks, how come I never see anybody losing weight? Oh yeah, because they aren't eating oil, fish, dairy, meat or wine, but they are sitting down to many pasta dishes daily. Mmmmm...carbs. That is cheating, though. I think you are only supposed to eat 1 or 2 small meals a day while fasting. Some February you're going to see this on the cover of a fitness magazine: "Lenten Fasting: Bikini ready by Easter! "

Is that blasphemous?